I’ve been able to get my iPhone to perform quite a few interesting tasks by clicking what I call the “improbability button *” on the iPhone headset.  As of this point, I’ve seen no prototype for similar function on Android phones.  Apple may really have an advantage here…

*with thanks to Douglas Adams “The Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy”

I recently looked up the official list of headset functions.  I’ve also discovered some additional functions through my research.  I’ve noted the official and unofficial functions here as a public services.  If you’ve found any additional functions, please let me know and I’ll add it to the list.

Play or pause a song or video:

• Press the center button once. Press again to resume playback.

Skip to the next song or chapter:

• Press the center button twice quickly.

Fast-forward:

• Press the center button twice quickly and hold.

Go to the previous song or chapter:

• Press the center button three times quickly.

Rewind:

• Press the center button three times quickly and hold.

Answer or end a call:

• Press the center button once to answer. Press again to end the call.

Decline an incoming call:

• Hold down the center button for about two seconds, then let go. When you let go, two low beeps confirm you declined the call.

Switch to an incoming or on-hold call and put the current call on hold:

• Press the center button once.  Press again to switch back tothe first call.

Switch to an incoming or on-hold call and end the current call:

• Hold down the center button for about two seconds, then let go. When you let go, two low beeps confirm you ended the first call.

Here are some of the other functions you may have heard rumors about:

Hang up on the party in your conference call who just made you look bad:

• Quickly click the middle and minus button in succession 3 times  middle/”minus”, middle/”minus”, middle/”minus”.

Take back the stupid thing you just said:

• Quickly click the “minus” button 5 times, stomp your feet twice, pray

Stand out in a crowd:

• Quickly hit the “plus” button seven times and shout “I Deny This Reality”

Cause your boss or co-worker a small amount of physical pain (in Person):

• Click all three buttons at the same time, stomp on their foot

Cause your boss or co-worker a small amount of physical pain (during phone call):

• Click and hold “plus” button, scream like a hoot owl, press center button once to hang up.  (Then call back and say, “not sure what happened there, hate that AT&T”)

Retrieve your lost prototype iPhone after it gets left in a bar by one of your engineers, and written up by Gizmodo in glowing terms:

• Press “minus” button until your hand turns blue, then call the intellectual property police and have them harass the media outlets who worship you.

Retrieve your reputation for open-ness, developer and innovator friendliness after you’ve been revealed to be a bully.

• Sorry, no button for that.  Fixing a reputation after you’ve disappointed those who worship you is highly improbable.